Codependents have a struggle trying to find their true identity. This is because they seek approval from people or things outside themselves instead of looking for that approval from within.This type of behavior is learned and usually develops in childhood due to dysfunctional family relationships, particularly relating to childhood abuse. This can be due to many forms of abuse such as: emotional, physical, sexual and neglect. Although childhood abuse is a big indicator of codependency there are other ways of developing it as well (One example of this is being in a relationship with a narcissist.) Codependents typically don’t develop a sense of self because they are either controlled or neglected by a loved one. This loss of control can lead to a lack of self love and hinder development. Codependents are usually stuck in a flight or fight mode where they are constantly reacting to their environment. They may feel personally attacked at times due to their hyper vigilance when it comes to other people’s emotions. Due to this intense form of empathy they will conform to others emotions or beliefs because they are afraid of rejection. This can lead to severe depression and anxiety because they feel like they can’t express themselves truthfully. Codependents usually feel lost and unsure of what they want and can lead to a constant change in careers, change in majors if going to college, or change in appearance. This is where tattoos and piercings come along. Tattoos and piercings are a way of self expression and for most codependents their bodies are the only control they feel they have. They often want others to know who they are but may not be comfortable expressing themselves verbally so instead they conform to self expression in the form of tattoos and piercings. Tattoos and piercings may make a codependent feel in control and boost their ego although this is usually temporary due to the underlying cause of their unhappiness coming from within. If you know someone who may identify as a codependent based off the information above please don’t confront them about codependency. This may cause them to feel personally attacked and in turn feel rejected. Instead I would suggest trying to get them to open up about their own feelings and beliefs and create a trusting relationship that may give them the confidence to seek help themselves. Of course there are many other indicators of codependency and just because people have tattoos/piercings doesn’t necessarily mean they are codependent, this is just a sign that they may be. Please visit my blog for more information pertaining to codependency.
Published by thecourageouscodependent
My name is Krystal Neale. I am 26 years old, married, mother of two pups and currently practicing self love to find my inner self. This blog is my personal journey living with codependency. I hope readers find resources, inspiration, and hope reading my blog. In telling my story and experiences I hope to help others realize they are not alone in this journey to finding their true selves 💗 View more posts